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Okay, so the title sounds stupid, but like, I feel like in some ways it shouldn’t be August. I shouldn’t be prepping at work for school to start back up while juggling the continued stay at home stuff while also balancing the idea of having to go back into the office once a week, twice if someone is on vacation. There’s a part of me that feels, because we were stuck inside, and still are to a point, for so long that the year has kind fo whirlwind by.

Work is stressful because while it’s nice to work from home and the commute being from bed to desk and lunch being just rolling to the kitchen where I can cook pretty much anything I want for my meal has taken some of the stress off, in other ways it has added to the stress. Whereas before if I needed a signature today I could hop down to the office and get said signature, now I am dependant on hoping they see my email, open my email, actually read my email, and then digitally sign the paperwork I’ve sent over to them. And only have following up by email to get stuff fixed. It doesn’t sound like a lot, but when someone’s diploma is dependant on that signature, it’s super stressful to get it when it needs being gotten. There’s also the whole international students being able to get here stress. Can they still take their first semester of courses while waiting for their Visa appointments in October… can they still work as TA’s while in their country of origin… how do we pay them if they are in said country of origin since they don’t have the required paperwork that is usually given to them when they arrive here… It’s not easy answers, it’s not easy fixes, and it’s a world of headaches as the days pass by and the first day of classes steadily gets closer.

There’s also the added stress of having to deal with being in public to get basic human needs and all that it entails with keeping distant, wearing masks, making sure even with all that you are careful on how close people get and wondering who has things and who doesn’t and why is that woman coughing by the crackers.

In the beginning of the pandemic, I was crafting. I did resin, I painted, and I even made jewelry out of some of the paint skins that came from the paintings I did.

But stress kind of eats away at people. Or at least me. That and it got super hot out, and painting in a garage with no real air flow isn’t exactly easy, coupled with the town doing work on the street and painting has taking a back burner for the moment. Plus I have necklaces that need to be sold to good homes now. I’d originally, back in April hoped to sell at a couple conventions at the end of this year, beginning of next year but both have been postponed a year in order to hopefully see this pandemic over.

When painting wasn’t a thing I was doing, I read a little though not as much as I’d like. And I haven’t been writing. I think part of it’s just being cooped up inside and all. I donno if I should see if I can go to the Arboretum and find a tree and see if I can get some writing done in the outdoors. The tree picture above is from said Arboretum. My Mom and I went and walked around for the morning out there and I do have to say that it is lovely and quiet. They’re limiting the number of people that come in, and they’re all timed entrances so people will end up more spaced out than normal and so it was actually super peaceful when we went.

I’ve considered going to the park, but I was at the park a couple times the last few months and no one wheres a mask, no one adheres to social distancing, and the runners – I get why the runners don’t wear masks but still – aren’t exactly careful when they go by you for how close or far they are from you. And with living with Mom, it’s just not worth the risk.

I’ve also been doing a little crocheting in my spare time. I’ve made a few bees.

I think they’re super cute. Yes, these are going on my ‘I think I want to sell them’ list, though we’ll see. Ever since my wrist was in a cast, I can’t use it to crochet fast or often anymore so I’ve been slow to make these furry guys up. Granted since it looks like the next convention I’ll be attending is in November of 2021 – so help me if we haven’t gotten through this pandemic by then – I should be able to make up a small stock of them.

Also, I need to really buckle down and write. And edit. And get writer stuff done. The last few weekends, I’ve written about a hundred original words each, but it’s mostly staring at a blank computer screen or staring at a blank notebook page, which also doesn’t help the stress because now it’s like, but why can’t I write, why are the ideas up there in my brain but I can’t find the words to get them down on paper?

This is honestly the first time I’ve felt motivated to do anything social media wise that wasn’t post a photo of something cute, delicious or pretty – seriously my Instagram is getting the most love right now and even that’s few between. I’m working to get back into the posting game. Maybe if I go back to the posting on here and twitter and Instagram, finding a little more balance of normalcy, I can find my words again.

Here’s hoping anyway.