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Meri's Corner

~ A Writer's Thoughts and Reviews

Meri's Corner

Monthly Archives: August 2020

Wishes and Rainbows

17 Monday Aug 2020

Posted by MBenson in Personal Thoughts, Writing

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amblogging, amediting, amreading, amwriting, balancing, creativity, discoveries, enjoy, fantasy, goals, inspiration, life, musings, online presence, original fiction, original work, possible wip, ramblings, real life, thoughts, time, time management, update, what do, WIP, writing

I could say that I missed last Monday’s blog post because we had a storm! We lost power! All of which is true. About 4pm on Monday last week, a storm rolled in with tornado level winds and knocked my power out within a minute of the storm hitting my area and about five minutes before any actual rain happened. And we were left in the dark until about 10pm, which is luckier than some of the people I know who were without power for up to two days. Overall, the storm lasted maybe an hour and disappeared East rather quickly. But I also can’t deny that the post should have been written before 4pm on Monday as well.

The truth of the matter is that work gets to me and everything else kind of falls to the wayside. Which is not a good thing and I’m working to rectify it but it takes time.

Saturday before my missed Monday I was feeling super caged in with this whole stay at home order, so Mom and I went out to the Arboretum – wearing masks when around people but for the most part not too many people because large tree and plant area with lots of paths to walk and super limited in how many people come in over an hour to ensure limited interaction between visitors.

I was able to get some nice photos while we were there. Which is something that I always love to be able to do. It felt good to get out, spend some time really outside with some nature, and getting some sun. Yes, I can get sun in my backyard but it’s not the same with the neighbors talking on either side, someone playing music and the traffic noise from half a block away because we live off a busy street just an alley away.  There’s something a lot more relaxing about being able to go somewhere that’s quiet and for the most part just you and the trees and the bees.

And Sunday was spent mostly just vegging out to some Stardew Valley – it’s my go to game when I need to just relax and chill and get out of my head because it’s such a chill game.

And then the work week started again, and time just flew by. It seems to be doing that a lot lately. I never really know where the week goes, if I’m being honest. Even when I have enough to show that I’m being productive, it still feels like the day is gone before I really blink, and then it’s the weekend again and I need to try and rest before more work starts again.

I’m looking to really start getting back into writing again. I’ve probably said that before in posts, but I do mean it every time I say it. I want to get back on schedule, to get more words in, and to really get more stuff getting out in the world. Which means continuing to carve out some time to do that every week, and every day of said week.

I’ve also decided to try doing a million words in a year. All words technically. So like, the blog would count toward it, as would any non-fiction words I write – like my dabbling in RP, plus my actual original words.

I have a few plots that have been kicking around my head, begging to be written. And I really want to get my one Fae novel finished so I can get it out in the world. So lots of plans. I also want to see if there’s any way to get myself on like a full schedule – in so far as, have edits done by X, this idea plotted by Y, and first draft finished by Z to get a fairly good pace. I just also don’t want to push myself. The more stress I feel towards something, the more I tend to roll away from it.  Which wouldn’t be good either.

For the right this second, as I type it, it’s all just hand wavy plans. But I’m looking to make good on them all.

How is your August going so far? Can you believe we’re half way through it?

It’s Only May, Right?

03 Monday Aug 2020

Posted by MBenson in Personal Thoughts, Writing

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amblogging, amediting, amreading, amwriting, balancing, creativity, discoveries, enjoy, fantasy, goals, inspiration, life, musings, online presence, original fiction, original work, ramblings, real life, thoughts, time, time management, update, what do, WIP, writing

Okay, so the title sounds stupid, but like, I feel like in some ways it shouldn’t be August. I shouldn’t be prepping at work for school to start back up while juggling the continued stay at home stuff while also balancing the idea of having to go back into the office once a week, twice if someone is on vacation. There’s a part of me that feels, because we were stuck inside, and still are to a point, for so long that the year has kind fo whirlwind by.

Work is stressful because while it’s nice to work from home and the commute being from bed to desk and lunch being just rolling to the kitchen where I can cook pretty much anything I want for my meal has taken some of the stress off, in other ways it has added to the stress. Whereas before if I needed a signature today I could hop down to the office and get said signature, now I am dependant on hoping they see my email, open my email, actually read my email, and then digitally sign the paperwork I’ve sent over to them. And only have following up by email to get stuff fixed. It doesn’t sound like a lot, but when someone’s diploma is dependant on that signature, it’s super stressful to get it when it needs being gotten. There’s also the whole international students being able to get here stress. Can they still take their first semester of courses while waiting for their Visa appointments in October… can they still work as TA’s while in their country of origin… how do we pay them if they are in said country of origin since they don’t have the required paperwork that is usually given to them when they arrive here… It’s not easy answers, it’s not easy fixes, and it’s a world of headaches as the days pass by and the first day of classes steadily gets closer.

There’s also the added stress of having to deal with being in public to get basic human needs and all that it entails with keeping distant, wearing masks, making sure even with all that you are careful on how close people get and wondering who has things and who doesn’t and why is that woman coughing by the crackers.

In the beginning of the pandemic, I was crafting. I did resin, I painted, and I even made jewelry out of some of the paint skins that came from the paintings I did.

But stress kind of eats away at people. Or at least me. That and it got super hot out, and painting in a garage with no real air flow isn’t exactly easy, coupled with the town doing work on the street and painting has taking a back burner for the moment. Plus I have necklaces that need to be sold to good homes now. I’d originally, back in April hoped to sell at a couple conventions at the end of this year, beginning of next year but both have been postponed a year in order to hopefully see this pandemic over.

When painting wasn’t a thing I was doing, I read a little though not as much as I’d like. And I haven’t been writing. I think part of it’s just being cooped up inside and all. I donno if I should see if I can go to the Arboretum and find a tree and see if I can get some writing done in the outdoors. The tree picture above is from said Arboretum. My Mom and I went and walked around for the morning out there and I do have to say that it is lovely and quiet. They’re limiting the number of people that come in, and they’re all timed entrances so people will end up more spaced out than normal and so it was actually super peaceful when we went.

I’ve considered going to the park, but I was at the park a couple times the last few months and no one wheres a mask, no one adheres to social distancing, and the runners – I get why the runners don’t wear masks but still – aren’t exactly careful when they go by you for how close or far they are from you. And with living with Mom, it’s just not worth the risk.

I’ve also been doing a little crocheting in my spare time. I’ve made a few bees.

I think they’re super cute. Yes, these are going on my ‘I think I want to sell them’ list, though we’ll see. Ever since my wrist was in a cast, I can’t use it to crochet fast or often anymore so I’ve been slow to make these furry guys up. Granted since it looks like the next convention I’ll be attending is in November of 2021 – so help me if we haven’t gotten through this pandemic by then – I should be able to make up a small stock of them.

Also, I need to really buckle down and write. And edit. And get writer stuff done. The last few weekends, I’ve written about a hundred original words each, but it’s mostly staring at a blank computer screen or staring at a blank notebook page, which also doesn’t help the stress because now it’s like, but why can’t I write, why are the ideas up there in my brain but I can’t find the words to get them down on paper?

This is honestly the first time I’ve felt motivated to do anything social media wise that wasn’t post a photo of something cute, delicious or pretty – seriously my Instagram is getting the most love right now and even that’s few between. I’m working to get back into the posting game. Maybe if I go back to the posting on here and twitter and Instagram, finding a little more balance of normalcy, I can find my words again.

Here’s hoping anyway.

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